Love Island
by CatsBalletHarveySpecter
Summary: Set after the heart-wrenching "Love me how?" scene, Donna leaves Harvey to work for Louis. Louis sends Donna on a vacation to help her get over what happened. Mike suggests Harvey take a vacation to clear his head. They show up at the same resort.


Happy Suits day loves! It seems like I've been trapped in one-shot land lately and despite me telling myself I'm done for now, here we are again. So hello, I hope you don't mind and thanks for coming along on my little writing spree this week.

As much as I adore coming up with my own theories and ideas, I love working with other people to come up with something fun (if you haven't noticed already, I loooove to do collaborative stuff, and if you ever want to do something together, please, send me a message)

In the spirit of collaboration, suits day, and this writing spree I've found myself on, what started as tweet from Laura ( frenchdarvey) evolved into an outline and an idea sparked and well, you know the rest.

I also need to give a huge shoutout/thankyou to May ( darveyscactus) for being the best beta a girl could ask for because between bouncing ideas off each other and her reading my nonsense stories at weird hours of the night (because I don't know how to not post them right away), she's what makes all of my random ideas come together & makes me believe these one -shots aren't complete nonsense.

This story takes place after the heart-wrenching "Love me how?" scene and is a tad bit of an AU but not in a traditional sense.

I probably could have made this a two part thing but like I said, I sat down at the computer and it just happened.

Happy Reading - xx S

* * *

**Love Island**

_Now boarding Flight 29 to Fiji, connecting flights to ….._

Finally, despite the last-minute planning for this vacation, she was out of here; she'd been in dire need of a getaway for the better part of the past decade. With her wide-brimmed hat and the latest issue of Vogue tucked under her arm, she made her way to the gate, ready to get the hell out of this city, to get the hell away from him. Ten years, ten years she'd spent by his side and this is how they were going to leave things. She knows he never meant to hurt her, but his words cut like a knife and she doesn't know if she'll ever get over the way the thought of seeing him turns her stomach.

_You know I love you, Donna_

Please. He didn't love her, he just pitied her, and she wasn't going to stand around and accept his pity, so she left. She left him, she left whatever it was they had, and she packed up her desk and went to work for Louis. At least Louis appreciated her and was in touch with his emotions well enough to tell her how he was feeling. At least Louis didn't tell her he loved her and then couldn't tell her how.

She can't remember the last time she had a full week off work, but she jumped at the opportunity when Louis' suggested it may be best for her. Granted, he didn't know the full extent of the altercation that took place between her and Harvey, but he was kind enough to grant her some time off, nonetheless. In a last-minute panic, she agreed that some time away from the firm (and him) would do her some good, so she bought herself a plane ticket and here she was, ready to escape.

This would be good for her, she tried to convince herself. She would use the week to catch up on some reading, maybe get a tan. All that mattered was that it was a week free of meetings, paperwork and Harvey Specter. That was the only rule she'd made for herself while she tossed an assortment of beachwear into her bag, she wasn't to think about him. Well, that and she wasn't taking her cellphone with her. This was her chance to unwind and enjoy having no responsibilities.

She hands the young woman at the gate her passport and flashes her a smile as she boards the plane. Goodbye New York, hello island life!

.

.

His eyes jut open as the numbers on his alarm clock come into focus, 9:30am, he was late. Pushing himself out of bed, he closes his eyes in an attempt to steady his whirling head, his cotton mouth making it clear he drank way too much last night. His intention was never to drink himself to sleep, but after she told him she was leaving he didn't know how to respond to the way he felt. Empty, broken, abandoned.

Why did he have to go and tell her he loved her? And why did she have to ask how? Didn't she know? Did he even know? The questions are never-ending as he grunts and makes his way to the washroom to get ready for the client meeting he will inevitably be late for. God, he really fucked up this time. She told him she was leaving him but maybe she was bluffing? That must have been the case, he would go into work and she would be sitting at her desk, waiting for him with a smart-ass remark about how punctual he was. Except, she wasn't.

He didn't see her all day and when he finally did spot her, she was laughing with Louis over coffee in the lunchroom. She smiles softly at him when she spots him and makes her way over to where he's standing, asking if they can talk.

"I don't have anything to say…" he mumbles, pretending to focus on a scuff mark on his shoe as he spoke.

"I want to help you find a replacement" she tries, trying to find his eyes so he can see she's being sincere, but he refuses to meet her gaze.

"I think you've done enough. Why don't you run back to Louis and leave me alone" he mutters, not finding the strength to show her how broken he is after their argument last night and instead he puts up his guard.

"If that's how things are going to be then fine! Have a nice life, Harvey" she exclaims and brushes past him out of the kitchen, leaving the remaining staff members in the room to wonder what the pair were arguing about.

Stumbling back to his office, the edges of the world begin to blur as the white noise rises in his ears, echoing through his mind. He hasn't the slightest clue what's happening, only that he can't catch his breath as he flops into his chair. Reaching to pour himself a glass of water, his outstretched hand is shaking uncontrollably, and he slams his eyes shut in hopes it will stop. After a few moments, his breathing returns to normal and the world becomes clear again, but he remains rooted in his seat, terrified. What the hell just happened?

.

A few days later he found himself in a similar situation after Mike asked him where Donna had been. Unable to catch his breath he can hear Mike panicking and rambling on about calling 911. He manages to squeak out that it's just what he's discovered to be a panic attack and it will pass.

Once it passes, Mike seats himself across from Harvey and stares at him concerningly.

"Harv-"

"Save it, Mike."

"Harvey, you need to get help. Or at least take a break from this place."

"I don't have time for either of those things" Harvey dismisses Mike's comments and flips open his laptop.

"I know you're busy but at least think about it, alright? Take a week, get out of here. Maybe treat yourself to some time on an island, clearing your head might do you some good" Mike adds before seeing himself out of the office.

Mike's words resonate with him for a moment, maybe the kid had a point, he hadn't taken a vacation since, well since ever. Pulling up a page filled with last-minute deals his eyes skim down the page until they settle on an all-inclusive package for a week in Fiji. He wouldn't mind some time to himself, he could clear his head and more importantly, he could clear her from his mind. Clicking on the book now icon, he thinks, what the hell, some time away would do him some good.

.

.

"Welcome to the island Miss" a large man wearing a lei greets her as she pulls her suitcase up to the check-in desk and is handed some sort of tropical drink complete with a miniature umbrella.

"How was your flight?" he asks as she rummages around in her bag for her credit card.

"It was wonderful, thank you" she grins at him and passes her card to the desk clerk.

Verifying her information, he hands her a room key and tells her that her room is poolside with an ocean view, room 106. She thanks them both and makes her way to her room to freshen up after the flight, excited to get a bathing suit on and hit the beach.

.

.

"Can I give you a hand with that sir?" a man wearing a pink floral necklace asks Harvey as he lugs his suitcase to the lobby towards the reception desk. His initial flight was overbooked so he'd taken a later one and had to sit in the airport for an extra three hours, a fact that was already putting a damper on his vacation mood.

"I've got it" he waves the man off and proceeds to make his way to the desk.

"Checking in for one, Harvey Specter" he tells the clerk as he hands over his credit card. He'd been on this island for nearly 20 minutes and he didn't feel any more relaxed, maybe once he had a few drinks and found the pool, things would be more enjoyable.

"Here you go sir. We've updated you to a room with a view to make up for the flight confusion. Your room number is 108" he says handing Harvey his room key.

Harvey thanks him and grabs a fruity drink off one of the trays in the lobby and makes his way to his room to change. He needed to find the bar and he needed to find it now.

.

.

By the time the sun begins to fall, Donna has had her fair share of drinks and is enjoying the over attentiveness of the pool boys working at the resort. Her favourite one, Matthew, was currently fetching her a new drink whilst one of the others was off getting her a snack. Placing her hands above her head as she relaxed further into her pool chair, she realized she hadn't thought about work, or anyone at work almost all day. Maybe Louis was right, some time away was what she needed to clear her head. At the office, it was like everything she did revolved around Harvey and it was time she started putting herself first. She wouldn't allow herself to wonder what he would have thought of this place, or what he would look like in swim trunks, lounging at the pool bar. It was something she occasionally found herself doing, wondering what he would think of something. But not this week, this week was for her and she wouldn't let her mind wander there. Even if the man sitting at the pool bar looked eerily like Harvey from behind. The moles lining the his back like what she remembered of Harvey's back from the other time. The sandy hair and the way he was slumped over just slightly, creepily similar to her former bosses posture and hair colour.

Pull it together Donna, now you're seeing him, you've officially lost it. She shakes her head to clear the mirage, but it doesn't vanish, instead, the man seated at the pool bar turns around and she practically yelps as she falls off her chair. She would recognize that smile anywhere.

"Miss Paulsen! Are you alright?" three of the pool boys rush to her side to help her back into her chair and she tries her best to quickly get herself up without attracting too much attention, but it's too late. His eyes find hers and she knows he's spotted her. To make matters worse, he's spotted her laying on the pool deck in a racy black bikini.

Scrambling to collect her things and get back to her feet, she's dusting herself off when that familiar smile appears beside her.

"Harvey" she scoffs at him.

"Donna" he fires back, voice mirroring her own.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she folds her arms across her chest to hide the fact she's practically wearing nothing.

"I could ask you the same…"

"If you must know, I'm taking a vacation" she rolls her eyes to show how annoyed she is with his presence and he can't help but chuckle at her childishness.

"So am I…"

"Please, you don't take vacations" she points out.

"Mike thought it would be good for me."

"Since when do you listen to anything the kid says"

"Donna…" he begins but she swiftly cuts him off.

"Nope. Don't you 'Donna' me. We're not doing this. I came here to get away and that's exactly what I'm going to do, damnit! For the rest of this trip, you stay on your side of the resort, and I'll stay on mine!" she barks at him and turns to march off towards her room.

"Fine" he reluctantly agrees and begins to trail after her.

"Why are you following me?!" she demands to know as she approaches her room.

"I'm not, I'm going to my room?" he stares back at her holding up his key. The key that read 108.

"You've got to be kidding me!" she sighs, reaching for her key that read 106 and flinging her door open.

"I mean it Specter, you stay far away from me!"

.

.

She spent the next day and a half successfully avoiding any run-ins with Harvey. Her time was spent reading at the beach during the day and in the evenings, she grabbed dinner at the little restaurant along the water. She considered booking an early flight home, but she wasn't going to let even him ruin the first vacation she decided to take in a decade.

She was just beginning to relax when she spotted him cozied up to some blonde at the bar, a sight that made her blood boil. She knew he spotted her lying by the pool when he strolled up to the bar and now, he was making a show out of flirting with this poor girl. She knew he was doing it purposefully, saying something that would make the young girl laugh just loud enough so she could hear, tossing his arm around the girl's shoulder and whispering in her ear after he knew she was looking in his direction.

She smiles at the handsome gentlemen that seats himself next to her but doesn't give him the time of day, her attention already devoted to the scene unfolding at the bar.

She doesn't know why she cares. Okay, that's a lie she knows exactly why but she tells herself she couldn't care less about which girl Harvey Specter took to bed. And yet, she found herself stealing glances of him beneath her sunglasses, cringing as the girl's palm lingered on his forearm. She'd finally had it with his attempts to make her jealous when he leaned over and placed a kiss just below the girl's ear. She couldn't take it anymore, couldn't stand to watch what she knew was coming next. First, the girl would lean over and whisper something into Harvey's ear and he would chuckle. Then he would lean in and give her a soft peck on the lips before taking her hand and leading her off to god knows where and she just couldn't witness it, she knew it would crush her already broken heart.

She begins to gather her things when the man next to her clears her throat and catches her attention.

"You know, if you wanted to make him jealous, I could help you out?" he offers with a genuine smile and she's taken off guard that he noticed where she was staring.

"I wasn't-"

"Please, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that guy is trying to make you jealous, or that it's working," he smirks as he watches her relax her stance and offer him the slightest smile.

"For what it's worth, he's probably a jerk that doesn't deserve you, but I meant what I said if you want to make him jealous, just say the word."

"You would really do that for someone you just met?" she asks.

"For a pretty girl like you, of course," he grins back at her and she contemplates taking him up on his offer. She's about to tell him she better not when she hears the obnoxious blonde giggle from the bar and before she knows what she's doing she's agreed to making Harvey jealous with this total stranger.

"I just realized I don't even know your name" she laughs as she takes the seat next to him that he's gesturing to.

"Donovan, and you are?"

"Donna" she introduces herself.

"How fitting, see, we already make a great team. Alright tell me why Mr tall dark and handsome over there is trying to make you jealous" he nudges her shoulder playfully.

"Honestly, it's a long story. Let's just say, it's complicated."

"Ah, well you know what's not complicated? Making a man like that jealous, do you trust me?"

God, she has no idea what's come over her but for some reason, she really does trust that Donovan wants to help her. Maybe it's the honest look in his eye or maybe it's the raging jealousy ripping through her but all she wants at this moment is for him to feel what she feels.

"I do" she replies, and he playfully tickles her side which causes her to giggle, and she catches Harvey's head turn out of the corner of her eye.

"Don't look at him, he's watching" Donovan whispers to her when she moves to turn her head.

"Now, say something cute and put your hand on my arm" he instructs softly.

"Are you sure that will work?"

"Trust me, if I saw the lady I loved doing that to someone else, I would be a whirling dervish of jealousy."

"Harvey isn't in love with me" she feels like clarifying.

"Who are you trying to convince, me or yourself? Alright, he's looking over here again, showtime" he winks at her and she does what he's instructed her too.

She turns her head slightly and from the corner of her eye, she watches as Harvey excuses himself from the bar, leaving the blonde alone with her drink and she can't help but smirk.

Once he's out of sight, she turns to Donovan and thanks him for his help. He tells her it was his pleasure and if things didn't work out with Harvey, which he hoped they did, she could always give him a call.

She's nearly inside her hotel room when she hears his door click open and he appears in the hall between their rooms.

He spots her and a grin slowly makes its way across his face when he realizes she's alone.

"Where's your friend?" he pries

"Where's yours?" she rallies, eyes meeting his with equal tenacity.

"Jealous, are we?" he clucks, studying her defensive stance as he rocks back on his heels.

"Of Malibu Barbie? Please, she's not even your type" she scoffs, opening the door to her room and leaving him standing alone in the hall.

_Because you're my type_, he thinks to himself, watching as she disappears behind the door. Seeing her come back to her room alone a wave of relief washes over him. He couldn't even handle the sight of her being close to that guy let alone the thought of him touching her, kissing her. He thought by flirting with the blonde he'd get her attention but boy did his plan backfire. Not only did he have to avoid the blonde, (what was her name again?) the rest of his trip but Donna seemed to be even angrier with him than when she first spotted him here.

What was he thinking, trying to make her jealous? Was she even the jealous type? She didn't seem to be jealous of Scottie, but every once and a while he got the sense that the two women danced on eggshells around one another, so he figured, maybe she was. After this afternoon he could rule, '_make her jealous_', off his list of ways to get her attention on this trip. And he could confirm that he was the jealous type because he wanted to put her little man friend through a wall.

He was going to need another way of getting her attention, and he was starting to think apologizing again was the way to go.

.

Leaning back against her closed door she lets out a frustrated sigh and sinks to the floor. He was so infuriating! Who did he think he was accusing her of being jealous? She hated what an ass he could be, but then, why did she care whether or not he hit it off with the blonde? It was likely the same reason she couldn't stay and work for him after he couldn't tell her how he loved her. She was in love with him, despite his jerk-like tendencies and his need to put himself first; she was absolutely taken with the man and she had no idea what she was going to do about it.

She came here to escape, to move on and yet, here he was, staying in the room next to hers. Maybe it was a sign from the universe, telling her she should give him another chance. Or maybe, fate was just playing a cruel trick on her. Either way, she was exhausted and in need of a shower and all of the nonsense swirling around in her head could wait.

.

.

Spotting her alone on the beach, book in hand he decided she'd probably cooled off enough by now that it was safe to approach her. Plopping himself into the chair beside her, he pulls out his own book and begins to silently read, waiting until she notices him.

"What are you doing?" she looks over at him.

"Reading. The same as you" he answers without averting his eyes from the page.

"I meant it when I said to stay on your side of the resort Harvey."

"I came over here to apologize, for the way we left things" he mumbles down into his book.

"What was that?"

"I wanted to apologize," he says a little bit louder, turning to face her this time.

"Why?"

"Because I hate that we aren't on speaking terms Donna. Can't you see that it's killing me here?"

"Fine. You can sit there. But this doesn't mean I've forgiven you…"

"Fine"

"Fine"

The two of them spend the afternoon reading in silence side by side. Harvey fetches them both drinks and lunch once the afternoon sun begins to fade and they eat in silence, staring at the waves crashing against the shore.

He knows it isn't much progress, but it's progress regardless.

.

.

She hasn't forgiven him for what happened, but she must admit, the company during dinner is nice, even if no words are exchanged. She doesn't plan on going back to work for him, it would only serve as a constant reminder of everything she once wanted but couldn't have, but as the night wears on and he stays rooted at her side, she starts to think maybe she can overlook their altercation, at least for the rest of the week. She can even look past his attempts at making her jealous because when it all comes down to it, she misses him.

After finishing their meal, they both return to their novels as the sun begins to set over the ocean, painting the sky in a sea of marmalade. Peering over the top of her book, she watches as he reads, clearly engrossed in whatever the story line was, his crinkled brow a tell-tale sign of his interest.

"Are you going to the show later?" she asks, breaking the silence and dropping her book to her lap.

"I was thinking about it, are you?" he places his bookmark into his novel and places it down beside him, giving her his undivided attention.

"Yes," she responds softly, not sure of what she wants to say next.

"Does that mean you'd like me not to go?"

"Actually, I was thinking it wouldn't be the worst thing if we went and sat together" she rattles the words out quickly, "you know if you wanted to go."

"I can't see why not" he answers with a timid smile.

"Donna-" he begins again and she abruptly cuts him off before he can continue.

"One condition, we're not talking about it. For the duration of this trip, you don't have to stay on your side of the resort if you don't bring it up. Deal?"

The solemn look in her eye tells him she's dead serious and he knows better than to argue with her, so he agrees to her terms and tells her he'll save her a seat at the show before collecting his things and making his way back to his room to change.

.

.

"Wow, you look…" he stops himself from saying beautiful, not wanting to cross the line while their friendship was mending, "nice" he concludes, sending her a tight-lipped smile while gesturing towards the open seat beside him.

"Thank you," she responds, cheeks flushed with red even though she knows nice isn't his word of choice.

She opted to wear a yellow halter dress detailed with small blue flowers that left her back exposed, perfect for a night out at the beach. With her hair pulled out of her face in a low bun, her freckles are on full display and she slightly regrets not wearing her hair down to better hide the blush that rises to her cheeks at his compliment.

"You look nice too," she adds, glancing over at the white collared shirt that he had rolled to his elbows and his navy pants. She rarely saw him dressed down and in the past 72 hours she'd seen more of casual Harvey than she'd ever imagined and she had to admit, he looked just as good in casual clothes as he did in Tom Ford.

"So, do you like magicians or was this just something to do?" he asks, returning his attention to the stage while casually letting his arm hang over the back of her chair.

"I could tell you, but the magic's in the mystery" she grins, and he can't help but notice it's the first time he's seen her genuinely smile since being here.

"Donna" he whispers as the lights dim around the and the Emcee takes the stage, "Don't take this the wrong way, but you have a beautiful smile."

_Ladies and gentlemen prepare to be amazed!_

The magician appears on stage before she can respond to his statement and the show begins with the gentlemen in the top hat pulling a chain of colourful scarves out of his sleeve. Donna's eyes stay glued on the stage, watching as the man who called himself Aaron the Great released a flock of doves into the air. He watches her face light up as the act continues, and he's suddenly extremely grateful Mike convinced him that he needed a vacation. He loves seeing her like this, taken in by the show being put on in front of them, so relaxed and just completely _Donna_. There was simply no other way to describe her. He'd once heard her describe herself as _Donna_ and ever since that day he discovered there was no word more fitting when describing her. There was no one on this planet quite like her and watching the way the lights danced across her face, painting it in shades of blue and red, he suddenly finds himself wondering why it was so difficult to tell her how he loved her.

It suddenly hits him like a ton of bricks, something he should have known years ago. It was the way she finished his sentences but wasn't afraid to call him on his bullshit. The way she was always one step ahead of him while simultaneously being there for him. The way she was seemingly oblivious of the way she made him feel, the effect she had on him. Suddenly, he just knows how he loves her. Unfortunately, he also knows that he can't tell her now, not after everything they'd been through this past week.

If he told her now, she would think he was trying to get her to stay at his desk and he didn't want that. He didn't want her to think that he was telling her because he thought he owed it to her. When he told her how he loved her, he wanted her to know he meant every word he was saying.

"And you little lady, come on up here!"

Harvey looks up and finds the magician holding his hand out for Donna to join him on stage. She accepts his hand and joins the other volunteers on stage, standing in line right in front of Harvey. The magician makes his way to center stage and begins to explain what the volunteers will be doing, and Harvey audibly gulps once he hears the instructions.

"I'm going to hypnotize you each one by one. When I count down from three and snap my fingers, you'll be under my spell and I want you to imitate someone" he explains, "Who do we want them to imitate, audience?" he asks the crowd and Harvey's stomach sinks when some guy from the front row calls out "Their bosses!"

Donna's eyes find Harvey's and she tries to read him but fails, his eyes clouded with an unfamiliar emotion. He sends her a small nod when it's her turn and she takes a steadying breath before doing as the magician tells her and closing her eyes.

When she opens them again, he can tell she's no longer herself, not completely and he's intrigued, wondering what she'll do when asked to impersonate him. His knuckles go white as he grips the sides of his seat, nervous that she'll say something that will further rattle their already strained relationship, or worse, something that will rattle his heart.

"Donna, can you raise your right arm" Aaron instructs and she does what she's told.

"Perfect, now when I snap my fingers on two, you're going to do your best impression of your boss. One, Two" he snaps and a smile grows across Donna's face as she flicks her right hand at her waist.

"Life is like this," she waves her hand around to emphasize, "And I like this" she flicks her hand up above her head and the crowd laughs.

"I see this one has got quite the character for a boss" Aaron chuckles, urging her to continue.

"Me? I'm the best closer this city has ever seen because I pull off the kind of shit only Harvey Specter can pull of" she grins placing a hand on her hip dramatically which causes the audience to roar.

He can't help but chuckle at the way she's portraying him, so over the top yet so him. It's over before he knows it and the Aaron guides her towards her seat as she slowly snaps out of her daze, turning to Harvey as he approaches and placing Donna's hand in his.

"Your boyfriends got you now doll" he smiles at Donna before returning to the stage.

"I'm not her-" Harvey begins to correct the man but Donna cuts him off with a sluggish, "He's not my boyfriend."

Helping her back into her seat, they enjoy the end of the show in silence, Harvey's hand still in Donna's where the magician placed it. When the lights finally come back on and as Donna comes to her senses, she realizes she's still holding Harvey's hand and blushes as she looks down at their interlocked fingers. He follows her gaze down to their hands but doesn't drop her hand immediately, craving her touch for just a moment longer. When he finally reluctantly releases her hand, she gets up and asks if he wants to grab a drink before she heads to bed.

.

.

They find themselves seated at the bar, laughing as Harvey fills her in on her impressions of him. She's relieved to hear she didn't do anything stupid; like recalling bits from their latest feud and the reason for this trip, and she's finally beginning to relax as she sips on her strawberry daiquiri.

"Were you worried when I went up there?" she finds herself teasing him as she begins to enjoy the night.

"I knew you would do me justice, I'm a great boss" he flirts back, and an awkward silence fills the space between them as it hits them that he isn't her boss anymore.

"I should get to bed," she says, getting up and tossing a tip down on the bar.

"I'll walk with you" he gets up to join her and they walk towards their rooms in silence.

Stopping outside her door, he leans against the wall as she fishes for her key, the alcohol giving her a hard time.

"Let me," he says, accepting her bag and rooting around in the bottom for her key. Finding it tucked into the pouch at the side of the bag, he grabs it and opens her door, waiting as she makes her way inside and leans against the doorframe.

"Goodnight, Donna" he smiles and turns to make his way to his room.

"Goodnight, Harvey" she replies, shutting the door and allowing her feet to carry her to bed.

.

.

The next day he contemplates knocking on her door to see if she wants to join him for breakfast but decides against it, heading to the buffet alone. His eyes scan the crowd for her red locks, but he doesn't spot her anywhere. Grabbing himself a coffee and a bagel, he makes his way to a table overlooking the pool and prepares to start his day. Taking a bite of his bagel, he realizes he hasn't touched his cellphone all week, in fact, work hadn't even crossed his mind. It was unsettling, to be so preoccupied he forgot about his commitments, but at the same time it was freeing. It gave him time to realize what Donna meant to him and that alone made this trip worth it.

He mulls over ways to tell her how he feels as he finishes his breakfast but the only thing he can think of is the one thing she barred him from talking about, and he doesn't want to risk being booted back to the other side of the island if he brings up what happened that night. He's weighing his options when he spots her stroll by, beach bag in hand and before he can stop himself, he calls out to her and waves.

"Are you headed to the beach?" he calls over to her across the pool.

"What gave it away?" she sarcastically replies, gesturing to the giant bag on her arm.

"Mind if I join you?"

"Only if you promise not to wear a speedo" she laughs, winding a loose strand of hair through her fingers.

"Damn it, that's all I brought" he winks.

"Guess you're out of luck" she calls back, turning on her heel with a small wave and strutting towards the beach.

He heads back to his room to grab his swim trunks, now more confused than ever. Was she just flirting with him, or was he reading into it? Had their banter always been so flirty?

.

.

She's easy to spot amongst the crowd on the beach, pale freckled skin beneath that black bikini that caught his eye on his first day here, her eyes hidden beneath Audrey style sunglasses. He spreads a towel out next to where she's lying, reading, his eyes roaming her body for a brief second before she notices he's joined her and closes her book.

"I've never seen you read so much" he observes, beginning to lather his forearms with sunscreen.

"I never have the time" she points out, sitting up and joining him in reapplying her own sunscreen.

"You never went on vacations as a kid?" he asks, moving to apply the lotion to his face.

"My father lost most of our money when I was young, so we never really did the whole family vacation thing."

"Me neither. Dad was always traveling when we were young and when he stopped, well, you know…" he lets his thought trail off, unable to bring himself to say the words needed to finish the sentence.

"I'm not even sure I would've liked a family vacation" she thinks out loud, "It just seems stressful to me."

"Can't argue with that. Plus, Disneyland is probably overrated" he smirks, "Do you mind?" he asks, holding out the tube of sunscreen and motioning towards his back. She climbs up to sit on her knees and gestures for him to turn so she can reach his back, dumping the contents of the bottle into her hand before swiping her palm across his bare shoulders. She works her way down his lower back and kneads the lotion into his skin, her nervous tingling with each touch, his heart rate increasing as she trailed the excess lotion along his shoulder towards his flexed bicep. When she's out of lotion she flops back down onto her stomach and remarks on his previous line, "Definitely overrated. Can you do me please?"

"Pardon?" he practically spits, wondering if he's heard her correctly or if he was too distracted from the way her hands felt against his bare skin to pay attention.

"Can you put some on my back?" she repeats her question and he mimics her action from moments before, filling the palm of his hand with lotion.

"Make sure you get it under the straps, I don't want tan weird tan lines" she mumbles into the ground and he hovers over her, hands tentatively covering her shoulders with sunscreen. His fingers grace the edges of her bikini top, but he doesn't dare let them explore the skin beneath it, even with her specific instructions to do so. It doesn't go unnoticed and she scolds him until he finally gives in and slips his fingers beneath the strap of her bathing suit top. He cautiously allows his hand to roam across her back, letting it linger a second after the sunscreen is long gone before removing it with flushed cheeks. She thanks him for his help and the two of them spend the afternoon lying on towels talking about why Disneyland was a waste of money and how so many parents try and buy their children's love with extravagant trips.

At some point in the late afternoon when the heat becomes unbearable, Donna excuses herself to go cool off in the water leaving Harvey to ogle her soaked, bikini-clad body when she rejoined him. A sight he knows will play on a loop in his mind for the foreseeable future. On her way back to her towel she spots Donovan and he waves her over.

"I see everything worked out" he nods towards where Harvey is tanning.

"It's not like that, we're just friends" she begins to explain before she realizes explaining her and Harvey's story would take hours.

"Sure thing, darling. If my friends looked at me the way that man looked at you, I'd be in some deep trouble" he chuckles, patting her on the shoulder before making his way to the water.

Rejoining him at the towels, she flops down next to him and reaches for her book, content to spend the afternoon wrapped up in a world of fictional problems. Harvey eventually drifts off to sleep as she progresses through her novel and she decides to let him rest while she orders dinner for each of them from one of the wait staff that the resort had on the beach. Three days ago, she would have bitten his head off for trying to come near her, but now she found herself enjoying his company, even if he was only sleeping next to her while she read.

She hadn't had much time to work through her feelings like she hoped she would have, so while she waits for their meal to arrive, she takes the opportunity to go for a short stroll along the waters edge. She was surprised Harvey had been so willing to accept her rule after he was so insistent on bringing up what happened that night, but he'd been surprising her all week. For starters, never in a million years did she peg him for a vacation kind of guy, but for some reason unbeknownst to her, he took Mike's advice and here he was. He'd offered to give her space on several occasions, which was uncharacteristic of him, and she swears she's caught him stealing glances of her when he thinks she isn't looking.

But if that was true, and if in some bizarre universe he really did have feelings for her, why couldn't he tell her how he loved her? She, of all people understood what a complicated relationship he had with his emotions, but if you really loved someone, it should be easy to tell them, shouldn't it?

If this trip had taught her anything, it was that she was even more confused now than ever before, but she loved him and having her guard up was getting her nowhere. Perhaps it was time to let herself go, just a little bit. She wasn't willing to go through the heartbreak again, but if she didn't at least put herself out there, she'd be denying the universe the second chance she seemed to be destined to give him. Her quick stroll turns into a long self-reflection and when she finally returns to their spot Harvey is wide awake and eating the food she ordered.

"I'm sorry I didn't wait. I wasn't sure when you'd be back, and I was starving" he apologizes as she joins him.

"Don't worry about it" she smiles, eyes landing on a bowl of red next to his knee.

"Did you order those?" she smirks at the bowl containing strawberries topped with whipped cream.

"As badly as I wish it was me, they brought them over with dinner" he says, popping a berry into his mouth, "Don't go getting any ideas, Paulsen" he smirks as she shoves a berry into her mouth, the whipped cream sticking to her upper lip.

"What kind of ideas would I get from an innocent fruit like a strawberry?" she licks her lips clean and flashes him the most mischievous smirk he's ever seen.

"Nothing… I mean…" he flounders for an answer which only causes her to giggle.

"Alright, see if you can toss one into my mouth" she opens wide and leans back to demonstrate.

"What are we, six?"

"Common, it'll be fun. We can make a game out of it!"

The first berry misses her completely, landing near a couple tanning nearby and the pair can no longer contain their laughter when the couple glares over at them. The second berry bounces off her nose and leaves a trail of strawberry juice down her face. Seven berries later and she finally manages to catch one in her mouth between the laughs and the smart-ass comments from Harvey about his tossing not being the problem.

The day slowly fades into the early evening and soon they find themselves the last ones on the beach under a starry sky, time having slipped away. Being together like this felt just like old times where they would have drinks in his office and talk about nothing and everything all the same. There was a familiarity and comfort that was evident and laying on their backs beneath the stars there were no words needed.

Harvey is the first to break the silence, turning his head towards her and calling her name in a whisper.

"I know we aren't talking about it, but I think Louis is going to make an amazing boss" he says.

After letting his words linger for a few moments, he gets up and tosses his shirt over his head and into the sand.

"What are you doing?" she eyes him curiously.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm going for a swim" he flashes her a smile as he walks himself backwards towards the water's edge.

"Are you insane?! It's pitch black and probably freezing!" she calls to him as he wades backward into the water.

"What are you, scared of the ocean or something?"

"I'm scared of the unknown" she yells back; and wasn't that the truth.

"Aren't we all?" he screams, watching as her mood shifts and she tosses her sundress to the side, taking a cautious step in his direction.

"Common Paulsen, don't you trust that I'll keep you safe?"

"If I drown, I'm going to have my people sue you" she teases, stopping ankle-deep in the water, starring at where he's standing, water covering his hips, that trademark grin plastered across his face.

"Noted" he chuckles, wading shallower until he's standing next to her.

"You're not going any deeper than that, are you?"

"You know me so well" she mocks him, content with keeping her hair dry.

"And here I was thinking you knew me better," he smirks before scooping her up in his arms and tossing her into the water as she shrieks his name. When she immerses from below the surface she stares at him like he's gone mad and runs in his direction, "It's so on!" she yells, jumping onto his back and forcing him beneath the surface.

"How's that pretty boy hair looking now?" she teases as he shakes out his hair.

"Are you calling me pretty?" he peers down at her, knee deep in the ocean, suddenly aware of how close they're standing to one another, his heart begins to race in his chest.

"What if I am?" she flirts, tugging at her bottom lip with her teeth and taking a small step towards him.

"You're asking for trouble" he laughs, scooping her in his arms once again and carrying her deeper into the water, her arms wrapped around his neck.

They spend the majority of the evening frolicking in the water under the moonlight, taking turns soaking each other, letting their touches linger, allowing themselves time in the other's arms. She can't remember the last time they touched like this, so freely. With each touch, the bare skin contact set her nerve endings on fire and she began to wonder why they worked so hard to maintain their distance over the years. After drying off they wander back up the beach towards their rooms and holding his breath, Harvey slips his fingers between hers. She squeezes his hand in response and he smiles down at her. They take the long route back to their rooms, enjoying the conversation and the way their fingers fit so perfectly between one another's. The moonlight illuminating the path between their doors, Harvey interrupts her mid-sentence to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, an action that causes her breath to hitch in her throat. He releases his hold on her hand and she instantly misses the connection, the way her skin came alive with his touch. He's quick to replace the touch with a soft caress of her cheek and cupping her face, he closes the distance between them with a delicate kiss. It's a slow kiss, but the moment his lips connect with hers, nothing else matters. It doesn't last as long as she would like and when he breaks it he rests his forehead against hers before stepping back.

He wants to continue to kiss her more than anything in the world, but he knows she wants more, and he doesn't want to continue until she knows he does too. He just hasn't found the right words to tell her he does and it's eating him up inside.

"Well, goodnight Donna" he mumbles, not sure of what to say or do next.

"Goodnight? That's all?"

"What more do you want me to say?"

"I want you to say something!" she screams at him, arms coming up to hit him in the chest, "'I want you to tell me you didn't feel what I felt tonight!"

"Of course, I felt it, Donna."

"Then tell me!"

"I can't!" he tosses his arms over his head in frustration.

"You can, you just won't!" she yells, turning on her heel to storm away from him.

"Donna, wait!" He calls after her and she whirls back around to face him.

"How do you love me Harvey?"

He stares down at the ground and kicks at a fallen leaf, unable to meet her gaze and avoiding looking at her altogether.

"That's all I needed to hear…" she sighs and the next thing he hears is her door slamming shut.

He knows he shouldn't leave things this way, but he decides to give her some time to cool off before he tries to explain himself. God, why was it so hard for him to tell her how he loved her? She'd made it obvious she wanted to hear what he had to say, so why couldn't he do it? What did he have to lose? He was already losing her at this point, there was quite literally nothing for him to lose. Leaning back against his headboard he decides he's just going to go for it, take a leap of faith and tell her he wants everything. As he relaxes into his mattress, he can't hold back his impending yawn any longer. He was going to tell her first thing tomorrow. After he got some rest and found the right words, it was time.

.

.

His knocks go unanswered for a second time that morning and he begins to wonder if perhaps she was already at the beach for the day. After a quick scan of the crowd on the beach and near the pool, he decides to ask the man at the front desk if he'd seen Donna.

"I believe Miss Paulsen checked out this morning to catch the 10 o'clock flight sir" the man tells him and Harvey feels his heart plummet. He'd really messed up this time. Last week he lost her to Louis and now she was on her way to a different country. This couldn't be how it ended, he was finally ready and he could only hope that if he caught her before she left, she would give him one final chance. A final chance he knew he didn't deserve.

Panicked, he asks the clerk what time it was and upon hearing that he missed her flight, he purchased the first available ticket home and was on his way to the airport faster than the magician had pulled those doves out of his hat. The journey to the airport felt like the longest cab ride of his life, the flight to the city even longer. When he finally stepped foot on the ground in New York, he'd nearly lost track of his mission. He had to tell her he loved her before he lost her, for good this time.

He hopped in a cab and shouted her address at the driver, practically sprinting out the car door once it arrived but he found her apartment vacant. She wouldn't go into work, would she? It was a Thursday, maybe she stopped by the office to get some work done instead of going home. It was a long shot, but he figured it was worth investigating.

.

.

She didn't want to run, but he left her with no choice. How many chances could she give him before she was just a fool? Tossing her clothes into her suitcase, she boarded the first plane off the island with tear-filled eyes, silently saying goodbye to any hope of something between her and Harvey. She never should have let her guard down this week, never should have let him back in. Time and time again she granted him second chances and he continued to make her look the fool. She can't believe she thought he'd changed in just a few days time. Of course he couldn't tell her how he loved her, he was Harvey Specter, emotionally unavailable hot-shot lawyer. Maybe she was fooling herself, maybe that kiss meant nothing to him, the kiss she was still replaying on a loop in her mind as she boarded her plane back to the city. So simple, yet she could feel it in her toes.

Once she was back in the city, she couldn't bring herself to return to her empty apartment and wallow in self-pity, so she heads straight to the office, suitcase and all.

"Donna, you're back early!" Mike greets her as she steps off the elevator, "Louis said you were on vacation until next week?"

"I guess I was just vacationed out" she replies as he steps into the elevator.

"Where did you say you went again?"

"Fiji" she replies as the doors begin to shut, separating her and Mike.

"Wait, isn't that where-" Mike's sentence is cut short by the closing elevators doors and Donna has never been more grateful for the timing of those stupid things. Making her way to her desk, she drops off her suitcase next to her desk chair and makes herself busy preparing Louis' schedule for the following week.

When Louis returns from court, he's surprised to find Donna at her desk, typing up a storm and he calls her into his office.

"What happened?" he stares up at her from across his desk.

"What makes you think something happened?" she plays dumb, fiddling with her thumbs behind her back.

"Common Donna. No one willingly cuts their vacation short without a reason."

"I can give you the reason, Louis" Harvey calls from behind her.

She whirls around to find him dressed in a casual button-down shirt and swim trunks, breathless and standing in the entrance to Louis' office.

"Harvey? I thought you were off this week? Why are you dressed like that?"

"I was at the beach, but I had to catch a last-minute flight" he explains, walking towards Donna, his eyes refusing to leave hers until he comes to an abrupt stop a few feet in front of her.

"Why's that?" she asks, her body suddenly overcome with a mixture of nervous and anxiousness.

"Louis, can you give us a minute?" he asks.

"Um, ya, sure" Louis mumbles, excusing himself from his own office.

"I love that you're always right. Even when you're wrong, you're somehow right" he says, taking a step towards her once they're alone.

"Your smile. I've told you this before, but you have the most beautiful smile. God, it could start my day that smile. And you have the biggest heart of anyone I've ever met. You put up with all my bullshit and still find time to be there for me. You are electric, when you walk into a room all eyes land on you and it has nothing to do with how show-stoppingly beautiful you are, it's because you pull the kind of shit only Donna Paulsen can get away with."

"Harvey, what are you-"

"Doing? You see Donna, you left before I had the chance to tell you why I love you, and I couldn't let you walk away without knowing how I love you." He says, taking her hands in his and closing the distance between them.

"How do you love me?" she whispers, peering up at him beneath tear-soaked lashes.

"Like I can't live without you" he answers, pulling her in by the waist for a proper kiss. Unlike the tender kiss they shared the night before, they both give themselves to this kiss, his tongue seeking hers out as he tightens his arms around her waist and scoops her feet off the ground briefly.

Breaking their kiss, Harvey rests his nose against Donna's and smiles.

"What?"

"What do you say we put the rest of our vacation time to good use?" he smirks.

* * *

AN: Yes, I named this after a reality show that I don't even watch - xx S


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